Let’s be real: 364.5 days of the year, motherhood is loaded with a fair mix of joy, frustration, pride, disappointment, special moments, stinky moments, “aha” moments, and “wtf” moments. In fact, when tots are tinier it can feel like you’re living in what I call, “diaper darkness” where days and nights can blur with childcare of endless kinds.
Having three babies in four years, I remember the days when I thought I was the only one in the neighborhood who knew what our newspaper boy who delivered the paper at 4am looked like. I remember finding various body fluids and food groups plastered to my clothing at the end of the day and not caring if I fell asleep in that shirt anyway. I remember my friend who was an ultra-glam fashion model who just had twins tell me that she keeps finding poop in her fingernails. Seriously not glam.
My Friend Violet knows that for us to be our best selves as mothers, we need to be our best selves as whole humans. In order for us to bring healthy energy and teach through example, we must self-care in mind, body, and spirit. Here are some tips for emerging from Diaper Darkness:
- Not everything is urgent. Triage the important stuff and let go of some of the pressure points of “perfect mom” mode.
- Remember that you are more than just mom. Being a mother is only one facet of your full self. When we let those other facets lay dormant, we are more apt to slip into diaper darkness. Stay connected to your whole self physically, mentally, professionally, and in relationships.
- Create sacred space for your self-care physically, including sexually. So many women let go of their physical and sexual self-care during the thick of parenting. Not only does that diminish their energy and elevate their stress, but it also can yield an underlying resentment of sorts toward motherhood.
We have lots of articles and interviews on how to self-care here at My Friend Violet. Check them out! And from My Friend Violet to all the Moms out there: HEALTHY Mother’s Day every single day of the year.
“Every day is a day to celebrate YOU!“- Your Friend, Violet